Read e-book online Petroleum Man PDF

By Stanley Crawford

ISBN-10: 1585677493

ISBN-13: 9781585677498

Petroleum guy is a singular of Swiftean malice and biting humor that demanding situations the dogmas of either side of the present sociopolitical divide--blue states and pink states, haves and havenots, trickle-down conservatives and bleeding-heart liberals. Bewildered via the odious "liberal democrat" developments of his son-in-law Chip, Leon Tuggs--self-made arch-capitalist billionaire, inventor of the ever-present and environmentally harmful Thingie, and writer of the influential basic conception of commercial Sex--decides to rescue his grandchildren from a lifetime of guilt, indecision, and existential nervousness by way of teaching them within the approach the realm really works and telling them the issues no instructor or guardian in our politically-correct and morally relative universe may well ever enterprise to claim. those existence classes to his grandchildren are followed through gifts--cast-iron replicas of the automobiles he has owned in the course of his personal existence, a existence in vehicles.
From the 1939 Ford Fordor Sedan, during which the assumption for Tugg's first invention used to be conceived, to the 1992 Lincoln city vehicle Stretch Limousine, the entree to a hysterically charged disagreement among Tuggs and his relatives, Petroleum guy takes savor exposing the conceit and frailty of a few of the main popularly held prejudices of our instances.

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Ich habe die Augen zugemacht, wollte gar nicht wissen, was der da macht. « Aber der Kaffee war gut. Der war richtig gut. Ach, hat uns der Kaffee gut geschmeckt, der erste Genuss an diesem Tag. Was haben wir diesen Kaffee getrunken! Der war allerdings sehr stark. Dann verließen wir mit seltsam gestylter Haarpracht, wackelnd und zitternd vom Kaffee, »Figaros Locke« und ruckelten übernervös den Gehsteig entlang. « Geglaubt hat uns das keiner. Also auf zur »Letzten Bleibe«, unserer letzten Hoffnung.

Einer genaueren Beschreibung des Geschehens enthielt sich der Benno in seiner Erzählung. Benno wurde fortan für Privatveranstaltungen engagiert. Zum Lastwagenfahren blieb ihm keine Zeit mehr. Sein Terminkalender war voll. Seinen Tagesablauf musste er streng regeln. Außerdem musste er beachten: wenig Bewegung, viel Bier, da sein Bauchumfang wichtig war für seine Auftritte. Bevor er zu einem Termin loszog, holte er einen nicht mehr ganz frischen Fisch aus dem Kühlschrank, rieb sich damit ein, zog eines der zehn mit Öl und Dreck präparierten Unterhemden über und nahm seinen Kassettenrekorder.

Du, reich wär ich schon längst, wenn ich mein Geld nicht ausgegeben hätte, und von dem anderen reden wir nicht.

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Petroleum Man by Stanley Crawford


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